Sodding Piece of Shite

Life is a screw up, kno' that? Piece of Shite. I don't know what's sodding wrong about teacher's in school. Didn't check project, return it and ask us to re-do it. What's her wee problem i got no idea. Sometimes she's just a bitch. Everyone hates her. Picking on students is already hell and want us to extra 3 times the load of shite. In her hell dreams! Didn't even touch our folder and expect us to re-do in your favour? Maybe in your GRAVE i will. Goose!!!!! I seriously hate this sodding life of mine. Prefect's is also another screw up. Have you even see us do DUTY?? NEVER IN HELL. NEVER IN YOUR EYES! Only see our bloody mistakes. Ever gave us credit? No. Ever tell us GOOD JOB? NEVER. Ever scold us even we DO perfectly WELL? SODDINGLY HELL YEAH. What is the prob among you teachers. Wanna sack us? Go ahead. I don't care infact I will be happy! All you people only kno' what to do is to humilliate us and ask us to do workload that has been done again again & again. Lifeless bunch of people. We are tired of listening ya kno'? We listen we do but it's never enough for you guys. WE ARE TIRED. I am... Everyone is.... So much to do and stress is adding. PMR is nearing... I dont kno'... screw up life..

Without Thoughts

I'm just passing through every day without thoughts. Letting second by second, lead to hours and a day passed without knowing what am I going to do next. Just following the way without making my own path. I know that either a day or a time I got to face the reality but I can't. I know either way something bad is going to happen. And it just not nice.

Today we had PTC for Form 2s so I did class duty. 2 guys broke a window under my sight. And I thought I was in deep trouble but I was ok.. Board didn't take charges but warned the students instead. What else?? I had fun ushering and during class duty as we gossiped and shared secrets with students. It was fun and it was a good time sharing some private time with the students. I thank them for making my prefect's life so wonderful.

Havn't talk to Ash lately since different duty points. And I just wished something, a miracle at least, will happen. That would be great. Or something that would just clear my thoughts. I'm just so troubled by this. I really want this to end as quickly as possible...

:(

I'm Lost :(

Ever wonder how to go back to your original life and continue? I don't. I'm lost. And he knows that. He tries to help but I never gave him a chance. Want to know why? Why should I? There are 2 annoying, irritating, heart-breaking choices. And I've to make a choice. Yet, when you're not there, I miss you. When you're there, I can't forget him? What shit is this? And I'm in deep trouble cause of this. I blame myself for this. I was the one who made this happen. I was the one responsible for him. I don't deserve either one of you. I deserve a scolding, I deserve a slap and definitely I deserve a punishment. I don't need you. I can't have you. But why? Why do you have to stay with me? Be with me? I don't want. Cause I don't deserve you. Do you ever get it? Sometimes, I got to leave the past behind. But which is the past and which is the future? How would I know? Sometimes I deserve no one. You never give up. You strive and listen to yourself. You never hurt me. You loved me. But what about me? How many freaking times I've broken your tiny heart yet you stayed by me. You told me it's okay. You understand. You made me believe in myself when I don't. You gave me the top 10 reasons why you loved me when other guys can't. You gave me confidence when I'm so down till I break down to tears. You... Everything is YOU. Why? Why you when I don't deserve you?! You took care of me. Cared for me. And all I ever did was let you down, break you down and leave you in tears. You never did that to me. All those painful sharing.... All those cherishable moments.. You deserve better, my dear. Not me. Never will be me. Cause I don't want you to make the same mistake and regrets. What your friends said is true. It's puppy love, dear. Not true love. But you never listen huh? That's why you're so stubborn... Haiz.. Just thanks for always being there for me. I really appreciate you.

:)

Blueprint for Living

Hey people, Its Saturday. XD
I want to share something for you, readers, something.

<>

< I will instruct you and teach you;
in the way you should go;
I will guide you with My eye. > Psalms 12:8

So how is everyody's life? I went for Prefetcs Gathering today in St.John's and it was awesome. Many hot guys. But oh wells. The Malays there look like Chinese. Good looking, cute and buff. But most of all, my group.. RED, got FIRST! Thanks to hot guy shukri, with his good leadership skills and most ever guidance and tips, we win every single game in short time. It was awesome and fun. Met a lot of new people and they were all hyper. Except some of them. I had a great time.

Training was fine. Except was tired and extremely full due to late lunch. But other than that, today is a good day. And I have been away from home until 6.00 p.m. Going to bed early.. :)

Kids Happy

Hey people:
Ever wonder how to ever cheer yourself up after such depressing moments and thoughts that clouds your mind?? I did. I found a cure. I mean it really isn't nice when you're brain is like full of thoughts and not so nice thinking and stuff but well, everything will get to an end. So yeah. Well, I had fun today. And I am still smiling since 5.30 p.m. Wanna know why? This is why.

- This young little boy was sitting alone there. With no proper shoes. No racquet. Just sitting and watching. So I asked him, do you want to play? He nods but he said I don't have proper equipments. I say, I'll play with you when I'm free. And I did. He enjoyed. A lot. I did too. I cheered him up and it touches my heart.

Do people good and you'll feel happy. And I ask him to come next week. Again. He just gave me a big smile... :)

Balloons Popping!

Hello people,
We had prefet's gathering today and it was awesome. My friends and I made so many balloons and wasted so much of time popping all of it. What a great waste. And the questions are so dumb. Oh wells. All prefetcs looks like nerds except my school. The cool and "yeng" ones. Our band sang "Don't Stop Believing" and it was OMGEE... WONDERFUL. I'll update more tomorrow. Since I'm chatting with Benjamin on FB. XD.

Ciao!

Someone Retarded. XD

Hey people;
It's been awhile since I posted something. I guess the phrase "so much to do, so little time" it's true. I'm still not done with my homework. What to do. This is life. Today we had friendly match and it was boring. As in really boring. I only played 2 matches. Then I went for training. And I got leg cramp. It was sucky. It was painful and finally I gave up. I didn't want to continue. It will make it worse. So I came home. And now I'm blogging. I really feel sorry for Jeremy as I left our game hanging. But I can't do much since it was quite painful. What else? Khai lost to YC. Everyone was quite bumped out after friendly. We don't even know why we went training. I guess I convinced them to go. And everyone turned up. They are quite a good team mates. Especially Ryan. I brought him along. And he was under training. Not match play. But I guess he had fun. And Yu Cheng.. He asked me "Do you want to go to hospital?".. I just ruffled his hair and replied, "It's just a cramp lil boy." Isn't he just adorable? I guess that's all for today. Maybe the next post will be next week since school is starting again. And results coming back.

Ciao!